Why it's OK to change your mind
Plus podcast news and why I'm trekking 100km for breast cancer awareness
Last month I went to the hospital for surgery to remove my ovaries... and came home a few hours (and many tears) later with them intact.
I changed my mind.
I decided the potential benefits didn't necessarily outweigh the potential risks, albeit both very small. It was the right decision *for me*. I'll continue taking the monthly Zoladex injections that shut down my ovaries instead of having them removed.
I'd been planning this for months and had cleared my calendar and done lots of prep for surgery. The idea was that oestrogen feeds my cancer, and removing my ovaries would eliminate my cancer's food entirely. I know a lot of people with breast cancer who have had this operation, and that had reassured me.
But when it came to it, I started thinking I'm 41, I have pretty much naturally menopaused and barely produce oestrogen anyway. I worried that surgery was unnecessary, and even though this surgery is very low risk, I'd never forgive myself if something went wrong for a surgery that might not have been necessary. I'm still recovering from the surgery I had a year ago and I've put my body through so much. I'll doubtless need more operations in future, so why not save my credits?
As I sobbed away with my gown and stockings on, the surgeon was beyond brilliant. I felt incredibly bad for wasting her time but she told me I shouldn't go ahead unless I was absolutely sure. She didn't try to pressure me in either direction and gave me the time to think.
So I walked away. I changed my mind. I thought I’d regret it but, three weeks on, I'm sure I made the right decision for me.
Introducing my new podcast
In other news, I’m so excited to announce that I’m the new host of the Breast Cancer Now Podcast! This is a dream role for me, especially since this podcast helped me through my own secondary diagnosis in 2022. The first two episodes are up now so please do subscribe, listen and share.
It’s on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and all the usual platforms.
My next big physical challenge
This time last year, I could barely walk, having just had my cancerous sternum bone removed. Now I'm training to hike 100km across the glorious Bannau Brycheiniog (Brecon Beacons) with my husband Mark, who is as affected by my cancer as I am. We’re committed to raising a whopping £4,500 for the brilliant breast cancer awareness charity CoppaFeel! and we would hugely appreciate any pounds or pennies you can spare. Thank you to all those who have already sponsored us!
It’s been several years since I last did a trek for CoppaFeel! and sadly I’ve lost a lot of friends along the way, including my wonderful tent partner, Jess, from the Iceland trek we did in 2016. I am hugely grateful that I’m still here, so I’m doing this for Jess and for Laura and for Sarah, and for all those who can’t. ✨
Sending prayers. The title of this article intrigued me and I am glad you made the right decision and sorry you have to go through this
Good luck Laura from a fellow 2016 trekker. X