Reflections on 12 years of cancer
What would you do with more time?
Tomorrow is my 12-year ‘cancerversary’ – that’s 12 years since the day I was first diagnosed with breast cancer in 2012.
I no longer count the years of being ‘cancer-free’, since finding out the disease spread in 2022.
I now simply count years of life – and believe me, 12 years is an extraordinary length of time to survive after a cancer diagnosis at such a young age.
A few things I’ve done in that time:
Turn 30.
See my nieces grow up to become remarkable young women.
Endure a decade of online dating to finally meet a good man, marry him and become a stepmum to his frickin’ fantastic daughters.
Survive a global pandemic.
Turn 40.
Live long enough for scientists to identify the gene mutation that caused my cancer (PALB2).
Write a book; get it published.
Survive to a time where scientists are starting to use Artificial Intelligence to create personalised cancer care.
My point is that 12 years of time has bought me so much.
It’s not just the normal ‘life’ stuff, for which I am so grateful, but also medical advances that keep me alive.
I’ve been thinking a lot about time lately.
So many cancer patients don’t get the gift of time. They don’t have time to process their initial shock, let alone get to grips with the long-term reality of cancer. Others drop dead from diseases they didn’t know they had.
For me, 12 years – and particularly the last two years since my secondary diagnosis – has bought me time to move beyond being a cancer patient to someone who uses her shortened life prospects as a driver (and talks about herself in the third person).
I’m a nicer person now – a happier, more chilled one – although maybe that’s age.
I know people who are desperate for more time; people whose treatment lines are no longer working and who just want more time with their loved ones, or to experience the joy of a cup of tea with the sun on their face.
In another 12 years, who knows where we could be?
I hope I’m alive and that we’ve found a cure for cancer, but I’m not going to sit around waiting for that to happen. When you know exactly how you want to use it, time is such a glorious, precious thing.
Happy Life-iversary to me
In case you wanted to buy me a present for surviving 12 years, I would be beyond grateful if you might donate to my fundraising page for CoppaFeel!, the breast cancer awareness charity founded by the incredible Kris Hallenga, who died last month after 15 years of cancer.
Last week, Mark and I trekked 100km through the beautiful Brecon Beacons with a bunch of brilliant, inspiring people (and Harry Judd from McFly). It was HARD – so hard – but it was one of those life-defining experiences that you never forget and never regret.
We’ve raised an incredible amount of money but we’d love to get to £6,500 so if you can spare a fiver or a tenner, please sponsor us here.
The crumbs
A rundown of the stuff I’m loving right now
What I’ve been reading:
— Pity Party by Daisy Buchanan (out 11th July). I was bereft (in a good way) after finishing this gorgeous novel about grief, love, marriage and healing. Thank you marvellous Daisy for letting me read it ahead of publication.
What I’ve been watching:
— Queenie on Channel 4. I loved Candice Carty-Williams’ debut novel and the TV series nails it. Dionne Brown is the perfect casting, and Kyazike needs a spin-off show.
Where I’ve been eating:
— Jikoni in Marylebone from Ravinder Bhogal, who wrote a beautiful piece on solo dining for us in Waitrose Food magazine. Don’t miss the prawn toast scotch egg.
— Café Murano in Bermondsey. I was there last night to celebrate two years of the brilliant Dish podcast with Angela Hartnett and Nick Grimshaw. The smoked mackerel pate and pickled cucumber toasts were outrageous.
Food for thought
After a significant hiatus, I’m working on season three of my podcast, Life in Food with Laura Price. I’d LOVE you to subscribe.
I’ll leave you with this episode on Food and Fashion with the excellent Lauren Bravo, who has just launched a Substack.
Now I’m off to Margate to celebrate 12 years of LIVING with a very chilly swim in Walpole Tidal Pool and lunch at my favourite restaurant, Dory’s.
Yes yes to you!! 💕
Such a beautiful newsletter 💗